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on getting A’s

i’m tired, burned-out, and in need of some heaven-sent inspiration to get me through. in 3 weeks the first semester of my first year as a student in the US will end.  now i’m experiencing what can only be described as complete and utter katamaran (laziness).

to put things in perspective, i have really aimed for perfection since school started. my goal was to get all A’s for the 11 units i was registered for: college english composition, anatomy and physiology 1, and a 1 unit course about the health care profession. when i figured out that to get an A, the final tally of the scores i receive should not be lower than 10% of the total possible points – i decided that the only way to assure this is that i should aim for a perfect score ALL THE TIME.

why i need all A’s? 1) the program i’m trying to get in is very competitive. getting all A’s for the pre-requisites is the only guarantee i can give myself that i’ll be accepted, 2) self-vindication: i already have  science degree, i have no excuse not to be good at this, 3) to thwart-off any chance of teasing from my very (very) competitive husband who runs by the principle: kapag average olats (mediocres are losers).

to reach such a lofty objective, i had to follow a strict regimen that i never did before as a student. i was taking online classes for all the 11 units, this meant i was practically on my own when it comes to understanding the text, disciplining myself to study, and meeting all the deadlines that was posted for class. i initially thought online classes will be easier, and as always, i was wrong. but honestly, it’s a style of learning that works for me. with the maturity and initial college experience, i have already figured out the optimal way for me to learn. plus with my toddler as the main and unyielding presence in my day-to-day life, the only realistic schedule i can devote to studying was during the night when she’s asleep and during days when the husband is not at work.

so with my tight schedule in place and a clear goal to target, i studied like i’ve never studied before. if i studied the way i did now back in UP (at hindi tumambay sa casaa or sa org), i’m confident there would be a latin phrase in my college diploma. but i didn’t – that’s that, would i have done things differently knowing what i know now? i digress.

anyway, so where did all the hard work, sleepless night, being fueled by caffeine (during most days), and time away from sleeping beside my husband and daughter get me? to-date:

         all essays and exams for english composition class: perfect score

        anatomy and physiology exams, quizzes, assignments: +7 – which means, out of the total possible score that a student can get as of the moment, i have reached that grade, +7. how was this possible? there were bonus quizzes along the way and since most of my exams were never lower than 95/100 – my current grade exceeded the number of possible points.

      1 unit health care course: -20; meaning the grade that i must receive for my final project should not be lower than -20 from perfect score to ensure that i’ll get my A for the class. why such a low grade for this course? ang dali kase eh. seriously, this has been my problem back in college. when a subject is too easy and boring, i loose all interest and end up getting a low grade for an easy course. my lose, i know.

this wasn’t an easy fleet to accomplish – especially coming from me. i was never the A student. i was more of the B student who had lots of fun. i really didn’t care about grades and i only study when i like it. once it becomes hard or when fun is out of the picture, i stop. it was a blessing that i had inherent interest in learning because if not for that i would not have graduated at all. so aspiring for an A grade, and working my butt of everyday to be consistently great was not easy. as i have posted in FB, i have a newfound respect for honor students.

so what am i basically rambling about in this long blog post? it’s just that i’m tired, and that i need a break, but i can’t have a break – because there are 3 weeks left for the semester. based on my grades, (well, not for the 1 unit course) i could basically slack off by now.  the chances are high that even if i don’t get a relatively high-grade for the last essay (for english) and last exam (for a &P), i could still qualify for the A that i need.

chances. at this point in the game, should i leave the fulfilment of my goal to chance? i desperately want to. but i can’t – so i won’t.

consistency – that’s the killer.

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