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documenting the snake dream

after waking up to another anaconda dream, first thing i did was open this blog site to find out when i had the last one. i remember writing about it years back and i wanted to see when it was and what was life like those days. 

the last time i had the snake dream was mar 21, 2007.  i wasn’t  even pregnant then, was not yet a Christian, and we were still living the life of a tortured graduate student couple back in Richmond. life was boring, sad, and difficult. but the months after that proved to be more difficult in every sense of the word yet most fulfilling and life changing.

basically now i’m torn between two emotions. one is scared shitless – will i (we) go through something similar again? maybe not exactly the same thing but of the same essence? second emotion: scared excited – what has God have in store for us and how will it change our lives? will we have the faith to walk through the dark night that we are about to face (again)?

one thing is for sure, i am scared and not as confident as i should be considering the things we have been through the past years. i know i should be talking to God about this rather than dwelling on the mysticism of it all … i will, at least after i document this day on this blog.

what was the dream about? it was about the big snake again, this time i was the only recognizable character. there were other people in my dream but they were faceless or maybe i just don’t know who they were so i didn’t remember. we were in a residential compound that was recently devastated by the attack of a larger than life (probably allien origin) snake and i was trying to look for survivors in the houses as well as supplies that we may need for something i can’t recall. i remember being brave, yet a bit scared that the allien-snake will come back – but i was still fearlessly trekking the ruins, always looking outwards for any signs of it coming back to where we were. there were a series of houses at the far side of the road we were in and the people with me didn’t want to look through them but i insisted on going. i was heroic, yet fearful – the feeling was familiar and i can still somehow feel it now despite being awake the past 2 hours.

i was worried when i woke up, remembering the occurence of these snake dreams of mine has, in the past, marked certain periods of my life when i had to deal with the hardest trials. but in the middle of being scared, there was a voice in my head telling me that i shouldn’t be scared – that i am not allowed to get scared. I AM A CHRISTIAN NOW, i wasn’t then. i know this is a giant leap of thought to some but to those who understand, this spells out a major difference in outlook.

I AM A CHRISTIAN now. maybe God wants to be learn something, or maybe this is not his hand at work – the answer to this i’ll know once i meditate on it. but one thing is for sure, I am not alone on this and maybe that was where the “heroic” attitude was coming from.

anyway, i simply wanted to make sure i record this for future referencing – if in case the need arises.

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